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Roxy

Best Social Hobbies to Make New Friends?

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Roxy

What are some of the best hobbies to meet new people and maybe make friends/relationship? 

I'm not a big nightclub fan, but where else do people my age (20s) go these days to meet people? and don't feel like an idiot for chatting to someone? I mean I go gym but I wouldn't start a conversation with someone in a gym lol

It sucks because if you are not a party animal, you are really isolated.

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Ben
59 minutes ago, Roxy said:

 I mean I go gym but I wouldn't start a conversation with someone in a gym lol

Nope. Do it, and keep doing it. The more you practise breaking the ice with people the easier and more natural it begins to feel. Think of it in the same way you would a workout - you stress and exhaust muscles so that they grow and become stronger. Well, it is the EXACT same principle with meeting people and making friends. I've literally made friends all around the world just living by this principle, and at one time I was too anxious to even leave the house. Just like I was once too weak to deadlift 200kg. (See what I'm saying?)

When you begin to feel anxious, just remind yourself that you're actively growing at that time. If you were to run away from that, you'd be compromising that growth. And that  in the long term, will cause you more anxiety and grief than living in a world where you face and conquer fear. TRUST ME. 

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Nesf

I would say, choose a hobby that really interests you, and then see if there are any groups around or clubs you could join, in your local area. In the past, I've joined hiking groups because that's something I enjoy doing, though I had to go with someone, I couldn't go alone. But I did meet people with similar interests that way, and when walking it's somehow easier to talk to people. Sometimes online forums for hobbies organise meet-ups, Another thing you could do is volunteer work, that is a good way to meet people. I think that it's important to choose something that you enjoy doing, then you'll meet people with similar interests and have a motivation to go.

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Harrow

I'm 25 and I have the same problem, I used to go to clubs and bars when I was in my early 20. Because that is where everyone I used to know went, but in all honest I hated it. Now I just go where I have an interest, e.g I love movies so I go to the cinema a lot and sometimes I talk to people there, or I used to play sport and that was a good way to make friends. So my advice is find what you love and go where people go that like the same kind of things and that way you'll have something in common already. 

Hope that helps:)

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Roxy
1 hour ago, Eadric said:

I'm 25 and I have the same problem, I used to go to clubs and bars when I was in my early 20. Because that is where everyone I used to know went, but in all honest I hated it. Now I just go where I have an interest, e.g I love movies so I go to the cinema a lot and sometimes I talk to people there, or I used to play sport and that was a good way to make friends. So my advice is find what you love and go where people go that like the same kind of things and that way you'll have something in common already. 

Hope that helps:)

So you wouldn't suggest for me to go to Nightclubs and bars if I'm not a drinker or party animal? do you think that would me to be more anxious and depressive/panic attacks?

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aspieguy
2 minutes ago, Roxy said:

So you wouldn't suggest for me to go to Nightclubs and bars if I'm not a drinker or party animal? do you think that would me to be more anxious and depressive/panic attacks?

Nightclubs are the perfect way for an aspie to get sensory overload and social overload all at the same time. Don't go.

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Harrow

I agree with @aspieguythat it might not be the right place for you. I wouldn't say never go there's no harm in trying it and if it gets overwhelming you can always leave. The trick is do what makes you comfortable and with that more friends will come :)

And as to the panic attacks and been depressive because of the environment. I think that's a major possibility, until I got used to it that is often what happened to me 

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Chlillis

I agree I can stand clubbing, usually if I'm with my friends I struggle to last an hour in there before leaving, and then there's some places that are expensive, too loud and crammed.

Recently I've been to a few hiking events, but not a lot of younger people go to these sort of events, also I would always recommend volunteering or if you go on holiday travelling in youth hostels, I did this last year and I met loads of people who I still talk to today.

Have you tried a website called meetup.com? there's loads of different activities there with random groups of people. 

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Roxy

thing is guys where else do you meet people of similar ages these days? it is very difficult.. 

I love going to the cinema but how likely is it I meet someone through that? it isn't the place you usually get chatting to people..

So a nightclub or bar might not be ideal, but atleast you know the majority of people there are there for a reason, to meet people or because they want to have a good time. So they will more likely be open to getting approached etc.

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Nesf

I'm not sure how people find friends... I'm thinking about my sister who is a lot younger than me and has lots or friends... I think she meets them through work or her hobbies, and some of them are old school friends. I don't know if she meets people in bars or clubs or not.

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Harrow

I haven't lately but I used  too go to the cinema twice a week and I'd often see people that went as often so I generally started talking to them after or before a movie started. But besides that I've also often wondered how to find friends. Ideally it would be a place with like minded people and not be too busy. But where that would be I have no idea. 

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Aspergolfer

Golf is perfect for that.  You can play with others,  or by yourself. 

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enchantressnine

If you have a smartphone and data for it, Ingress is great. It's the reason why Pokémon Go exists, same idea but a lot more in depth. 

Two factions to choose from. Pick one based on their side not their color. I like green but I agreed with the blue team: basically a mystery substance has been discovered in Europe and the story line is that one team wants to learn about it thinking it can benefit the world (green = enlightened), the other thinks it's too dangerous and the material needs to be left alone (blue = Resistance, my faction). 

As you advance in the game, items of that level can be used, and lower. They get stronger as you do. Game currently maxes at level 16, but items are highest at 8. 

Meeting others in your faction can be done by using the faction tab in COMM to contact them. Simply ask if there is a team for your faction in your area. There probably is one. It's a great way to advance in the game with help, pull together to build up a network of portals you can hack gear from (farming), and most importantly, you will probably meet new people this way. 

Ingress has tournaments, or an anomaly series, currently every few months. Niantic selects cities to host events and agents travel from all over to participate, or you can play remotely. Also a GREAT way to meet people. I met an Aspie from my faction this way in Oregon! We talk every single day. My local resistance team is wonderful. Everyone is busy right now so we can't really get together, but we have Hangouts chat rooms for that. 

So there's my idea. :)

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StormCrow

I do (well haven't gone in a while) Contra Dancing.

It's mostly structure dancing in a line.

You keep changing partners for each dance, and go to different people along the line (always back to your current dance partner). there is a caller that says the moves, and usually you wait a little at the end of the line. So you can talk a little. but no long conversations that lead to silent awkwardness. the music isn't that loud, you can practice mobility. The only bad part is you have to look into someones eyes for the swings, otherwise you'll fall over.

 

No Friends my age though. and all my hobbies have me being the youngest.

Good Luck!

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Azkaban

I meet up with a group of other people with special needs every month or so and we always go bowling or play bingo. I also have friends from work and church. We don't share any common hobbies but we like to talk about our families and other things and just be together.

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DavidTheWitch

Politics actually?

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Laurie

I just joined a local tae kwon do school and I really love it. People are really friendly and nice and its good exercise too. 

 

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Eli

I agree strongly with Nesf. Do things that actually interest you, that you'll enjoy. Making friends, at least to me, can change your life. It's not something to rush. So make the right ones. Don't go to places just for the sake to meet anyone. The wrong kind of friend can very easily lead you down unhealthy paths, and make life worse.  Don't make friends. Make quality friends. So consider what you actually like, and start there. What do you like? Scour the internet for local clubs or events you'd enjoy. Good luck!

Edited by Eli
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