Jump to content

Our Picks

Top content from across the community, hand-picked by us.

How social are you? Do you go out and make an effort to be social, to fit in, make friends, etc, or so you prefer to be on your own? And if you are quite social, how much do you feel that you are affected by ASD and what coping stategies do you have to overcome the difficulties?
 
I used to be more social and tried to fit in even though it caused me problems and anxiety. It used to upset me that I didn't have a social life and close friends, but since being diagnosed I don't feel I need so much to try to socialise and don't go out nearly as often. I don't know whether this is due to my being older or due to my diagnosis affecting me psychologically. I'm now content to stay at home and don't often seek contact with others. I occasionally go out for a coffee or for a meal with a friend or family, but I have no close friends, most of my friendships are online ones these days.
 
For me it's not always the problem that I don't want to socialise and if asked out to go out for a meal, for example, I'm happy that they thought to invite me and provided it's a quiet restaurant I may well go, but the problems are when I arrive as I can easily be affected by the music, conversations going on around me, noises and smells from the kitchen, etc, and I find groups difficult because I can't join in, get bored and switch off, and if there's just one person it's tiring to talk and keep the conversation going... socialising means talking, and talking is exhausting! It's supposed to get easier as you get older but for me it's getting harder if anything, so I now find myself staying in nearly all the time and I'm not particularly social.
  • 218 replies

  I want to know the stories of people with Asperger's and their transition to adulthood.  Did you transitioned early or at the same time as NTs?  Or are you late and working on it?  Did you got a job while still in high school?  What happened after high school? Did you went to work, or college, or both, or none?  When did you leaved your parent's home and how did you afford to leave the nest and stay away from the nest?

 

  I started everything early.  I got my driver's license at 16 while on my senior year of high school.  I saved from my allowances about $1000 bucks, Dad helped with another $1000 and got me a beat up car.  Then there was a job fair at the school.  Me and a whole bunch of my classmates got jobs at a supermarket chain.  It was only really possible for kids who had cars.  Public transportation was just not reliable enough.  We would go to school, then drive to work, then go home... at 16yo.  

  Then the front door neighbor girl happened.  I had a car, and a job, and money for dates... and a girlfriend.  Life was good.

  She started dropping grades, her family forbid her from continuing a relationship... annndddd... we ran away.  We graduated, went to prom and never came back.  I rented a studio, asked to work full time, skipped college for a bit and did the whole live-in gf stuff, at 16yo.  Been on my own since.  

  Times have changed tho.  You can't even drive around at 16 on your own, it's illegal.  Let alone rent a place.  In retrospect, it was a mistake.  That ended in a divorce 5 years later.  Set me back on college and everything that came after that.  Not the worst mistake I made, I had even bigger screw-ups later on.  But the point is, I started early, too early and it was hard.  I could not understand why coworkers got mad at each others, the backstabbing, the boss's pets, the work politics... it took me decades to work those out.  

  I would have been way better off if I had just broke up with the gf, stay in course with college, keep the part time and maybe try out different jobs while still on the safety net of my parent's home.  And not just work.  I tried every romantic relationship like if "it has to be perfect, this is the one!".  That resulted in me bending over backwards trying to save things that were not destined to be in the first place.  

 

 
  • 19 replies

Hi everyone,

Of all the places on the internet, this is the one I always feel the least welcome in. But even so, I wanted to post an update.

Over the last 6 months or so a lot has happened in my life, and I've not physically or mentally been well enough to keep on top of everything, so I'm sorry about that - at the very least I should have tried to find someone to look after the forum for me until I was able to.

I have, over the past week, redesigned my website, ran updates here on the forum (which include altering the way the forum auto archives threads, so less threads will be locked now, and those that were locked, have been unlocked so long as they are under 2 years old and have more than 10 replies. I have also pinned @Nesf's 'cooling down' thread, in the Koby's Clubhouse forum, and will try and temp lock threads that are volatile and redirect them to the cooling down thread, and unlock the original thread after 24 hours or so). 

I've also made the vast majority of my YouTube videos public again, and have made some new ones. I have deleted a few videos, which were solely about me and my ex, but I have used some of the footage to make a few montage videos, just for old times sake. 

I'm currently studying at college and will be starting at University in September, though this is a huge strain on my health but they are very supportive so I hope to be able to manage.

Health wise, I have fibromyalgia, which my doctor is struggling to treat as I seem to be in a permanent 'flare up', so am constantly in pain and struggle to do even basic things most days (typing is particularly difficult for me at the moment). I also have an under active thyroid, which is being treated, but some negative effects are still persisting. I'm also finally in therapy for the PTSD which I have from my relationship with my ex - which is why I was finally able to tackle my YouTube channel, because I have the right support in place to deal with any issues that looking through videos of him throws up.

Now that I am in therapy, I feel able to do this again - and by this I mean, my YouTube channel, this forum, everything that I used to do alongside, and under the watchful eye of, my ex; I finally feel like I am strong enough to get back to doing what I started long before I was with him. And it's about f**king time!


Love always,

Willow
  • 17 replies

I realise there are more to be released in the future, but I thought I would run a poll of the ones released so far. Personally, my favourite is The Avengers (or Avengers Assemble over here in the UK ) Yeah, that is an obvious choice but so what? 
  • 25 replies

I went to doctors for a check up on my mental health an unrelated subject she wanted to check why my pulse was high and she did an ecg which was normal today 

She got the nurse to check my temp and turns out i have a fever and my body is fighting a chest infection

I said to her i dont feel ill even though i have a chest infection she thinks it may be due to my ASD thats why i dont feel ill even when i am 

Does anyone else have the same trait has me when its to do with your health? Was jusf interested in hearing a trait like that existed

 
  • 15 replies

Jobs For Aspergers?
  • 19 replies

Autism vs Aspergers
  • 20 replies

Do You Ever Worry You Don't Have Aspergers?
  • 285 replies

Announcements

×

Important Information

By using this site, you agree to our Terms of Use.