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A few weeks ago I was having flashbacks and I wanted to feel better so I messaged a friend of mine and told her that she was beautiful and cool and we had a nice conversation. I didn't talk about my flashbacks though. And I wonder if it would have been okay for me to do so. I just don't want to pressure her into talking to me if she don't want to, I don't want her to feel like, oh no, she has to chat with me right now or else I'm gonna do something drastic or whatever. She knows that I have them, I just didn't mention I'd been going through one for about a day or two.
When people make statements or ask questions, I find it difficult to determine whether they're looking for a "casual" or more in-depth response, which I think is why I have such difficulty relating to people on a lot of predominantly Neurotypical forums. I can completely understand why people would want to relax, mess around and enjoy each other's company, but when I ask for advice on something or make a serious statement, I want to receive long, in-depth, thoughtful and articulate responses, and I do not take kindly to being given short, inane, and decidedly unhelpful garbage instead. Apparently, a lot of people feel differently. On other forums, someone will ask for advice on something, and I'll respond with a long, thoughtful post. I'll try my best to explain and justify my points. Do people respond? Nope. Do they question me further? Nope. Do they even show the least bit of appreciation by clicking the "like" button? Again, no. I really wouldn't have an issue with this if it weren't for the fact that the same people are extremely responsive to other people's short, uninformative and inarticulate posts which completely lack care and attempts to justify the points made therein. They also seem to value (supposedly) humerous derailment posts which border upon spam more than the effort I've put into trying to assist them. So, let me get this straight: People who ask for help want me to intentionally respond to them in a way that isn't helpful? Okay. Why? It's so damn annoying when people ask for advice and then act as though I've done something wrong by giving them a long, in-depth answer with the intention of being as helpful as possible. The example above is from my experience online, but I imagine that some socially inclined Aspies will have experienced things like this in real life too. Have any of you noticed this?
Say you've been talking to a person for a while (an hour or so) on the phone, in person, etc., the person doesn't seem to want to end the conversation, but you want it to end (you're bored). How would you end the conversation without being rude? What would you tell them?