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Found 6 results

  1. Nallaa

    crisis period and school

    Hello, I'm not an official Aspie, but I woud like some advises regarding to my new school semester : I'm very very mentally tired since 2 weeks with my exams and other things, and especially now, and my teachers annouced us we have 5 group presentations to manage for this beginning of semester, which is way too much for me to manage at once, specially knowing I'm already on the edge of doing meltdowns. My partner is my friend and I don't want to let him down because he has bad scores and I have good ones, he is really counting on me (which is even more stressfull), but I'm already quite overwhelmed whereas it didn't start yet. Because I'm not diagnosed and never talked about this to my friends (which are not very close friends) I'm not feeling comfortable enough to tell them. I have the feeling that actually I don't have the right to ask anything to anybody.. Teachers don't want to let us working alone because they think it's not fair leting someone having more rights than the others (like not working in pairs). I don't see what I could do ? I really prefer to avoid letting my friend down, I would like him to go in an other group (they would be 3) and me alone, but I can't Do you have any advise for me ?
  2. Saveyourscissors

    When your anxious..?

    I've been thinking about when I'm anxious, I had to write a little about it recently and its kinda hard to hear other people say the things I do... I wondered if anyone else does any of these things? Here's the list of things that were pointed out that I do: Pull my hairBite my selfPunch thingsTwiddle my hairHead bang/but things. (walls/pillows/objects/other stuff)Hit my selfScratchShakeChew my tongueBite my nailsFiddle a lot with everything and anythingPinch myselfStop eatingPanicCan't get my words outShut down completely.Can't keep my hands still There is other stuff too, but these are the main things I seem to do/people notice I do but I didn't realise really that I do most of it...? Do you get that/Does that happen to you? After its happened its finished and I can't really remember all of it and shut off from it. You could say I did something but unless I can feel it or see a mark I won't recall doing it.. does that make sense? Is it just me or is it the same for anyone else?
  3. Does anyone else - when they're having a meltdown or a panic attack or are just crying really hard - feel that the insides of their chests feel unusual - almost as if someone's taken ahold of your lungs and is shaking them up and down and not letting you breathe normally? I've felt that way recently when I've been sad and crying a lot....and it was really bad when I had a bad panic attack a few months ago. It got to where I went from whimpering and sobbing to just making this high-pitched "zebra-like" noise, like "Wuh...wuh....wuh...wuuuhh...." It took me a really long time to be able to calm down and breathe properly, and I knew those two things were pretty much mutually exclusive...that is, I couldn't calm down until I was able to take long, deep breaths. My psychiatrist said it was hyperventilation. What I want to know is, has anyone else had any experience with this?
  4. Hi all! I think my 10 year old son may be an Aspie... actually, I feel pretty sure about it, but he's what some people would call "high functioning" so I can't seem to get a doctor to recognize it. Also, I'm not sure it would be beneficial for him to have the official label because he would definitely be unhappy if he felt people treated him differently. Anyway, I'm here because I'm hoping to get some insight into how to make our home life smoother. Most of the time he's very happy and extremely active. He's also really smart and funny. He's social, as long as he gets down time when he needs it, and he excels at school and in martial arts. What we struggle with the most: He's unable to regulate himself when he gets frustrated and if we try to help him, it seems to grow into anger and then a big argument between me and him or him and his dad. So, for example, he may ask me to help him with downloading a minecraft mod. If minecraft has updated, often the mod won't have been updated yet so I won't be able to install it (well, also because he never wants to downgrade his minecraft updates). I will try to explain why I can't update it and he will either get upset with me because he thinks I'm not looking for the answer hard enough OR he'll get upset with me for trying to explain to him why I can't do it. Then he'll raise his voice and say things that I feel are disrespectful and he can't understand why I feel that way and he gets upset because I try to correct him... and the next thing you know, we're either yelling at each other or he's melting down. This often happens when I can't find a solution to something that's frustrating him. He gets angry, he starts to get super frustrated, he keeps insisting that I help him, but he can't seem to answer any questions I have that might help me to help him find a solution and he disagrees with every suggestion I have using a really awful tone of voice until I get angry... and then he melts down. I have no idea what to do in those situations. I've tried asking him what he'd like me to do or if he has suggestions, but that just makes him more upset. Any questions seem to make him upset... I'd love any advice or suggestions you guys can offer me. Also, I wonder if any of you have or had problems sleeping alone when you were younger? Right now, he only seems to be able to sleep if he's touching both me and his dad (one on either side). Thanks for the help (and please let me know if I'm writing too much. I'm an explainer which seems to make my son really upset, so I apologize in advance if this bothers any of you as well.)
  5. Saveyourscissors


    I seem to be a lot more anxious lately I though going back to work would help as I'd get my routine back but I'm still anxious a lot. I feel like I'm walking on broken glass waiting for the next thing to make me anxious. It seems to be so often /: I've been taking myself out of the situation where possible but well that's not always possible. I'm finding bruises everywhere where I've bitten myself or hit myself or whatever else I've done in whilst in a state of anxiousness. An example which is making me notice this more than ever is on monday night I went to a gig, my favourite artist in the whole world! Dallas Green (city & colour) but I had to really force myself to go the whole time thinking I don't think I will cope I'm not in the right frame of mind, it's going to be really crowded in a small venue I won't be able to breath people will touch me. I'm too anxious already to go. But I know if I didn't try I'd regret it, when I was on the way I started to feel super I'll when we stopped at my mums (great another thing to unsettle me further) I questioned going again and I was already super struggling with noise and had my ear defenders on already at this point. They convinced me to go because the tickets cost like £60. So I got there and the queue was huge :/ we arrived late on purposes as I wanted to avoid crowds as much as I could in the situations. We queued and when it was us at the front they wanted to check my bag the man touched,y stuff which I don't like and he touched my arm as he was looking thought it and he was rude and I didn't him at this point I was ready to run off and phit something I was noting my cheeks wanting to bite my arm or anywhere I could reach I held back as much as I could and bite my hand as soon as I felt I could with out him seeing. He took my water bottle (brand new) and said I couldn't take it in and I got super stressed and questioned it and said well I have a very severe allergy and need access to it at anytime I may need to take a pilland he was all you can buy drinks inside but we had no money to buy drinks and that's another reason I took it but in the middle of a crown if I had a reaction I wouldn't be able to access water quick enough I was getting angry and it showed and he got ruder and more unreasonable. He to,d me to drink it or throw it away. So I had to drink some then throw it away /: he then took my deodorant and said I wasn't allowed that, I said why he said cause its an airosole pathetic it's a gig I don't want to smell and I always have it in my bad anyway! I had enough I'm poor right now why do they not tell you this on the website if it is a problem no other gig has ever done this too me!!!! They have only ever stopped you taking cameras with removable lenses in! I'm angry they didn't put this as a warning on website so that I wouldn't have taken it and lost my belonging. I had no more deodorant at home or money to buy some. Luckily we sorted it. Anyway I got in there and couldn't see a thing when the org act was on and I felt so stressed I was read to have a meltdown right there but held back for Josh's sake and to save myself being embarrassed that people could see me. I was biting and pinching myself fiddling with my hair and pulling and I was getting so anxious then josh suggested we change places and it was better we had a good view and space on he was close enough to touch me I was still on edge though then the inevitable happened support act ended and it was almost time for Dallas and people were getting closer and closer. I thought I could handle it but I was struggling anyway I coped just but then once he started that was is I accidentally touched a girls hand trying to get Josh's to feel safer and I freaked out inside. People were literally touching me from sides and front and josh behind. I kept him as close as possible to cope better but usually I would be in the zone and so distracted by dallas I wouldn't care but not this time I just couldn't stop worrying and thinking about it /: I enjoyed the music but as soon as we left I got to the car andre my ear defenders straight on it didn't help josh was walking really fast and wouldnt wait as he said I needed to speed up but my feet were killing and I couldn't but it was raining and cold and he wanted to get back to the car /: I just wanted to get home and get to bed. I wasn't excited or anything. Dallas green is my favourite thing, I usually completely shut f and calm down etc when I hear his music or am at his gigs I'm usually so happy I just couldn't get into that this time /: but I don't know why? Why am I seeming more anxious still now I have a routine back /: I don't like it and I need to find some calming/avoidance methods! Other thing is I used to have tiny outbursts and build it all up into one huge meltdown now I'm having more and each timer entry much instead of the build up I don't know which is better /: it's having less effect on others but not on me. I'm anxious 80% of the time worrying about almost everything /: If you have any iut or help or ideas or advice I will be really happy to hear from you . Thanks for reading
  6. Hi all, glad I found this website! Can anyone give me and my Partner (not my Son's Dad, but as good as) some advice on meltdowns, as he's starting to get a lot more violent with them now and has the strength of ten men when he's having one! Finding it really difficult, as once he's calmed down, he acts like nothing major has happened....Very hard when he's been physical with us! It's getting to the stage where my Partner is thinking it might be better to not be with me, because he is beginning to feel like he might have to get physical with my Son at some point in order to stop him from hurting us and himself...Not something he wants to do, but is worried it might come to that at some point in the future!....When things are running smoothly, we all get on so well and my Son has such a great relationship with my Partner and they adore each other....It's like having a different child when my Son has a meltdown and I don't know what to do to help the situation! Any advice would be greatly appreciated! Many Thanks
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