Jump to content
Bongo

Relationship Preference (As And Non-As)

Recommended Posts

sarah allen

NT or Aspie doesn't matter it basically depends on the same chemistry. When I was diagnosed with Aspergers I thought all my life I wanted to date a NT but then I found someone with the same interests and something we can laugh at I knew well hey he is an Aspie too. So I gave it a shot on me and him going out and we have been dating for about a year now it funny cause it mostly difficult for Aspergers adults to get in or start a relation but everyone that I know asks how did u date and make it work in an aspie relationship. But I say hey we find something in common.

  • Helpful 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
awesomeliza

I don't think I would mind, as long as the person understands me and is accepting of my 'eccentrities'.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
aspiesw

I could still only find myself with some who has AS, I'm too insecure to open myself up to someone who doesn't understand me, it would be pointless trying, my last relationship was a train wreck due to my AS. I would just overall feel more comfortable around someone with AS, I would just feel really self conscious and uncomfortable with an NT

  • Helpful 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
magus

I have been with a normal person for 10 year and married for a little bit of it, they don't understand, they take everything personally, I am an asshole, and I am dry and I should like parties, and why don't like our neighbor, ( because he's a retard lier, because the word groups he was using) how about her friends,( they are all over the board druggies and alcoholics.)

 

My whole area I live is drug addicts and Prostitutes. the IQ here is so low that those with high IQ's are attacked for fear that they will look stupid.

  • Helpful 3

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
peacefulwarrior

I have been with a normal person for 10 year and married for a little bit of it, they don't understand, they take everything personally, I am an asshole, and I am dry and I should like parties, and why don't like our neighbor, ( because he's a retard lier, because the word groups he was using) how about her friends,( they are all over the board druggies and alcoholics.)

 

My whole area I live is drug addicts and Prostitutes. the IQ here is so low that those with high IQ's are attacked for fear that they will look stupid.

Oh wow I can relate to this, sounds almost just like my life!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
haden

tbh i wouldnt mind aspie or nt as long as there is some basic connections and attraction an they are willing to be a bit more flexible to my moods then i am happy

i have not dated a aspie before tho but i wouldnt count my exs as NT either lol

as was engaged to some one great sex life an connected but i was more looking after her as at that time my depression was very little yet hers was extreme an had a eating disorder so i took on role of caring for her having her bad moods at me an things yet i kept cool.

 

then my current most recent ex gf now lets just say i would bet a lot to say she is an aspie or close to one cause she would throw tantrums over nothing an argue wsith me over tiny things such as cleaning dishs right after eating or if i should of put my coat on etc

even one tim e we arggued an she went mad at me cause we both thought we was ignoring each other so had a huge fall out to my roommate trying to calm us was tbh funny the next day looking at a stupid arguement

 

some times she would freak from being picked up or she would be happy by it but was always a rsik s

 

she was very much less touchy feely than me an still innoccent at 21 an me was her first proper bf she is almost ocd but more a aspie i say tbh takes one to know one lol an she would over react to things or go for long shutdowns.

tbh i cared for her but i see now out of it that we triggerd each other big time over nothing most of time.

 

i was attracted to her as fairly beautiful but very smart in ways yet very immature in others and she has similar taste to me in things.

but her lack of empathy an how she did convertations was very aspie like an try talking to her about feelings or look her in eyes she wouldnt, i hate looking in eyes but with her i tried.

 

sorry if off topic

 

guess i wanjt some one who aint gonna walk at sight of my social awkwardness an my shut/meltdowns

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Andrew004

My boyfriend is NT, it doesn't matter that much as I'm at the lower end of the spectrum and function fairly normally, apart from the disabling anxiety associated with my Aspergers. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
greenerthanyou

I don't think that I really care that much. I just like people (in general, not just romantic relationship) who are chill, honest and funny. Sometimes those people have asperger's, sometimes not.

I've yet to be in a real relationship (you know, with titles like boyfriend or girlfriend) so I don't really know what would actually work for me. But, whatever, I'd rather, at this time, stay open until I get more experience. But, the fact that I like honesty would probably lead me to prefer someone who is on the spectrum, so I'd be less confused and would know what's up.

  • Helpful 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
MichalBeth7

I tend to subconsciously pick people I'm close to (Not just my boyfriends/significant other.) that are what you would call mostly Aspie probably. My boyfriend probably has Aspergers, if you ask me, as well as my two close friends. I don't know if it really matters, it's just relative to who you are. I would rather have a quirky and unique guy, rather than an "average Joe", so to speak.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Echo

I'm in love with an NT partner. I've been living with him for over 10 years now and we have only ever had 1 argument. He loves me for who I am (and vice versa).  

  • Helpful 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Pharaoh_G

I've been in a relationship with all NTs most of my dating life, but I don't mind trying a relationship with someone in the spectrum. I think I might relate to someone with an ASD better.

In reality, diagnosis don't matter to me. I have to find better ways of staying in relationships and be more careful with how I choose my mate.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Ben

I often wonder... If a woman was to spend an evening in my company, and then the next night, she spends the evening in the company of an N.T, who would she more than likely prefer? 

 

Of course for this to be relevant, you would have to seek the opinion of several different women.

 

 

Any volunteers? I'm a good actor, I can play the N.T as well if you want... 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Pharaoh_G

I often wonder... If a woman was to spend an evening in my company, and then the next night, she spends the evening in the company of an N.T, who would she more than likely prefer? 

 

Of course for this to be relevant, you would have to seek the opinion of several different women.

 

 

Any volunteers? I'm a good actor, I can play the N.T as well if you want... 

 

In order for that to work, it will work best in a polyamorous setting where they all agree to the expereiment.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
dandelion

I often wonder... If a woman was to spend an evening in my company, and then the next night, she spends the evening in the company of an N.T, who would she more than likely prefer? 

 

Of course for this to be relevant, you would have to seek the opinion of several different women.

 

 

Any volunteers? I'm a good actor, I can play the N.T as well if you want... 

 

 

In order for that to work, it will work best in a polyamorous setting where they all agree to the expereiment.

 

ahahaha...  2 guys talking... NT or AS... I see no diference now...

 

:D :D

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Sofi

My boyfriend is NT, it doesn't matter that much as I'm at the lower end of the spectrum and function fairly normally, apart from the disabling anxiety associated with my Aspergers. 

Are you a male gay with a boyfriend? 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Andrew004

.

Edited by Andrew004

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Miss Chief

I have never gone out with someone else on the spectrum not that I think it would bother me but it has never come up.

 

To be honest I don't generally want to go out with people it just kind of happens to me somehow.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
blacktiger911

I wouldn't mind being in a relationship with an aspie. we could be the crazy people in our own crazy world....lol ;) I don't know I think that it would e better that way. I really...REALLY suck at trying to (catch myself a keeper). After my other and first relationship got shattered I have just stayed out of the love game because of fear but I would give it a shot with an aspie. 

 

 

 

Dear Santa for Christmas this year.......

  • Helpful 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
King_oni

I wouldn't mind being in a relationship with an aspie. we could be the crazy people in our own crazy world....lol ;) I don't know I think that it would e better that way. I really...REALLY suck at trying to (catch myself a keeper). After my other and first relationship got shattered I have just stayed out of the love game because of fear but I would give it a shot with an aspie. 

 

As much as my relationship with my girlfriend is pretty ok, it surely isn't a walk in the park either. Both being aspies it also means that you need to come to terms that you both might have specific interests you want to engage in (and thus you're slightly more "apart" in your relationship) and you also would have to deal with your partners (AS) issues... which might not necessarily be the same exact ones as yours. And that by itself is hard sometimes, cause I have no idea why something would actually upset her, just like she sometimes doesn't understand why something doesn't upset me.

 

And I know enough about the troubles of this, considering I'm dating an aspie now and I have dated a potential aspie for just under a decade before.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Gerrymanders Pose

i have aspergers  and She is very ADHD. Its a white knuckle ride with no seat belts.There are good days and bad days but hardly ever together.

In an ideal world the notion of being with a woman who wasn't off her nut is quite appealing but how would it work for me. It would be her who thought i was the nutcase,

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
RubySeahorse

My husband is Aspie too and it works really well for us. We've been together 10 years and married for just under a year. :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
poppyseed

My boyfriend has anxiety and TONS of quirks.  It's an important part of the relationship, because it makes us more understanding and patient with each other.  Wouldn't have it any other way!

  • Helpful 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
the-commander

i have a type but it has more to do with physical aperence then it does that and its certianly not the end all be all. honestly if i found out a girl was like me i might not date her. i mean if we were already invloved fine but yeah, i honestly dont want to many people to know what i have.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
ponz

I'd like to date an aspie or an NT with some aspie traits. My main focus is good communication and decent understanding. I don't care what they are so long as we have those 2 things.

Someone mentioned putting in the effort to make a relationship work, and that's something very important. I always fight until I can't fight anymore to make a relationship work, but unfortunately my partners just like to ride the high in the honeymoon phase and they toss me to the curb like garbage.

I haven't dated any diagnosed aspies, but some of them may have been or had quirks of it. They weren't very accepting of my limitations and would usually use emotional manipulation to make me do harmful things for their benefit.

I think what's most important is to find someone who doesn't want to cause me harm for their own needs. I'm not sure if such a lovely person would want to date me though. XP

  • Helpful 3

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
PandaPrincess

I just want someone who understands me and doesn't try to change me and constantly points out my flaws.  I just want someone who accepts me for who I am.  

  • Helpful 3

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

×

Important Information

By using this site, you agree to our Terms of Use.