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Alex

Before any of you engage in conversation with me, there's a few things you should know;

 

1. I sometimes swear a bit, usually in the company of my gamer friends. Although I can control it, and keep it clean if it isn't appropriate in the conversation.

 

2. I might start randomly singing cheesy songs, like 'Oh Mandy' by Barry Manilow or 'Vill Ha Dig' by Drömhus.

 

3. Sometimes I talk too much. Sometimes not so much. Sometimes I'm loud. Sometimes I'm quiet.

 

4. My laugh can be awkward at times, and I've been told that I sound like either Beavis or Butthead. I don't know which one.

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Sofi

On what basis do you assume that members under sixteen will be any less able to discuss certain topics that come up in conversation? Unless there is a law which could legally implicate the founder of a Skype group, it would seem that what you are proposing are unnecessary conversational boundaries which are insulting to the intelligence and maturity of younger members, with no basis in reality. Autistic people of any age can be vulnerable and sensitive to certain topics; maturity is not governed by age.

Yes, that's right Kuribo. I can see what this means. Because if I was in a chat and there was going to conversation topics of whatever sensitive nature, I wouldn't like it and I get stressed about certain ones and I can't take part in them and I'm almost 25 - society presumes I should be able to take part in those conversations. I also know someone on the spectrum online who is age 39 who would be equally unhappy and unable to talk about certain topics, however I know people younger than age 16 who would be very able to take part in those conversations and actually contribute a huge amount. Not necessarily anything to do with being on the spectrum or not, maybe it's just because people are all different by default (It probably is because I'm on the spectrum though!) But i feel as if I shouldn't say to people to keep their conversation clean for me because I'm 25 but I would rather they did unless I ask about it but then I feel like I'm being inappropriate and I never know if it's okay to ask or not. 

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Echo

On what basis do you assume that members under sixteen will be any less able to discuss certain topics that come up in conversation? Unless there is a law which could legally implicate the founder of a Skype group, it would seem that what you are proposing are unnecessary conversational boundaries which are insulting to the intelligence and maturity of younger members, with no basis in reality. Autistic people of any age can be vulnerable and sensitive to certain topics; maturity is not governed by age.

It was never my intention to discriminate against or segregate anyone on any grounds; age, intelligence ... for any reason!

You are more than welcome to join the group and discuss any issues; and I mean; any issues/topics/whatever (as I previously stated).

However, I for one, do not want to get in trouble for saying something which I shouldn't, in front of whom, by law, is considered to be a child or vulnerable adult (especially in the world we live in now, where you can be imprisoned, sued by parents, put on lists etc...for saying the wrong thing). I'm not arguing with you and I know from previous threads that you have an issue with this, but only a fool would ignore the potential dangers presented by this kind of communication including the vulnerable groups mentioned; dangers for both parties (which shouldn't be of any concern to someone who has stated in a previous post that he doesn't want to take part anyway).

I do not wish to patronise you, the only thing I ask is; that you think objectively rather than subjectively on the matter, if it is possible. I was asking for disclosure of age or anything which some members who find offensive to include etc...The only changes in the chat etc would concern; being mindful of others who are taking part, refraining from swearing etc , telling specific jokes or going into explicit sexual details ... It has to be addressed in some way (a way that is not deemed as insulting by members).

I can see where you're coming from and I appreciate the argument, but in no way did I imply in the slightest that you or any other member of Asperclick in your age group... Are/would be less able to discuss issues because of age or intelligence...all opinions are valid. One thing that you'll learn about me is; I do not assume! I do not; write between the lines! Thus, there is no need to attack me for saying something which I did not say :)

I am willing to listen to any alternatives you have to offer. Thanks for bringing this to my attention :)

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InDubioVeritas

I think this is a wonderful idea and I would be both pleased and honoured to participate.


 


It should offer us a low-pressure place to stay in touch, hang out in a virtual, safe and non-threatening space, offer some support at times and generally get to know each other better. I see it as an excellent add-on to the Asperclick browser, so to speak. Asperclick is our home, and this can be our holiday villa or safe haven. As Echo suggests, it might act as a type of social group, without some of the typical attendant pressures or impracticalities.


 


As for the issue of “age” and “maturity” affecting suitable topics, I think that is clearly something that demands some attention. However, any group requires guidelines and there will always be some topics that are best avoided or if addressed, handled carefully. I do not think I have ever participated in an internet group that did not have a list of rules or at least guidelines. Many, for example, frown on discussions of religion or politics as they tend to be divisive and emotive.


Whilst I agree that age and maturity are not interchangeable terms (I do not think Echo meant to suggest such), it is undeniable that they tend to be correlated and whilst using age as a proxy for maturity is not always reliable, it is frequently a necessity. The age of consent would be better measured by maturity as well, but since we cannot reliably judge the mind of another person, we are forced to place some trust in a reasonable assumption. It is not ideal, but it is the only practical option in most cases.


 


That said, I do not think we should worry too much about “age”. Indeed, I did not detect any such implication in what Echo suggested. I think she is merely keen to avoid making anyone uncomfortable or unwelcome. We should instead simply set clear ground-rules with regard to what topics should be avoided, which treated with care, mindful of the less mature members, and respect that when someone expresses discomfort with a topic being discussed, those who may wish to continue may do so in private.


 


Just my thoughts...


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HalfFull

Having hosted written chats for years I think this is a great idea. I did recently consider organising a one-off Skype Chat on another site for a special occasion, but planning the occasion itself took over too much. The idea of getting to hear the voices behind the words is exciting. Would be more exciting if people could also be 'seen' but I know that could be awkward for some people.

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Echo

Having hosted written chats for years I think this is a great idea. I did recently consider organising a one-off Skype Chat on another site for a special occasion, but planning the occasion itself took over too much. The idea of getting to hear the voices behind the words is exciting. Would be more exciting if people could also be 'seen' but I know that could be awkward for some people.

I don't mind doing 1-1 face calls (it depends on how I'm feeling on the day). Although it does terrify me a bit, I'd do it. The problem that I have found with multiple face calls is; you have to pay a premium to use the service unfortunately. I'll dig deeper into the how to's, no problem. Then, if people want to be shown how to host their own conference video call, I could show them how to do it. I welcome it, if it can be done and if others want to try to set this up. I'm going to stick to the IM and Skype call for now; as I'm fairly new to Skype.

:)

I'm looking forward to it too.

Given your experience; any pointers, tips etc? Thanks x

Edited by Echo

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aspiesw

I can't deal with talking at the moment. Group Chat sounds good though

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pianissimo

I like this idea although I think I would be very anxious at first and it would take a while before I felt able to join the voice chat. but then again it might be ok, I don't know. I can be very talkative or very quiet. It depends on whom I am talking to and the subject. I do swear but not a huge amount- it isn't a compulsion so I can be unsweary (my brain is mush- it's been a long day). 

 

It is a scary idea but if it works out, it could be a really good thing.

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Kuribo [old account]

Apologies, I was very tired earlier and didn't properly read the post; I'd be happy to join the IM group, I'm just not quite ready for voice chat yet.

However, I for one, do not want to get in trouble for saying something which I shouldn't, in front of whom, by law, is considered to be a child or vulnerable adult (especially in the world we live in now, where you can be imprisoned, sued by parents, put on lists etc...for saying the wrong thing).

I'm sixteen, but I still like to ensure that those younger are treated as equals as much as possible. Thanks for the explanation. I just wanted to know if any such measures were to avoid possible legal repercussions. Completely understandable. :)

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Echo

Apologies, I was very tired earlier and didn't properly read the post; I'd be happy to join the IM group, I'm just not quite ready for voice chat yet.

I'm sixteen, but I still like to ensure that those younger are treated as equals as much as possible. Thanks for the explanation. I just wanted to know if any such measures were to avoid possible legal repercussions. Completely understandable. :)

No worries :) Apology accepted.

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