Jump to content
Nesf

Your first memory

Recommended Posts

Heather
That's really interesting Heather, as that sounds like these times were definitely an early inclination to you having an ASD at that young age. But, obviously, you weren't diagnosed until a much older age. 

I certainly didn't play with other kids at the pre-school nursery I went to - I think I just caused complete chaos and the teachers basically told my mum they couldn't have me anymore, which started the diagnosis process. 

Yeah when I look back on it and read the preschool diagnosis, I think it was definitely a point where I could see I had ASD at that age.  I think my parents didn't really know what Aspergers or Autism even was back then.  They just thought I was really quiet and shy I think.  I'm not sure. 

 

Aww yeah I guess if you were causing chaos, and they didn't want you there anymore, there would be more determination to get you diagnosed so you could get the help you needed.  I guess because I was quiet and not disruptive, it was easier to ignore it?  Probably if it had been nowadays, I might have got diagnosed earlier because more teachers would probably know about AS and autism?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Sofi
Yeah when I look back on it and read the preschool diagnosis, I think it was definitely a point where I could see I had ASD at that age.  I think my parents didn't really know what Aspergers or Autism even was back then.  They just thought I was really quiet and shy I think.  I'm not sure. 

 

Aww yeah I guess if you were causing chaos, and they didn't want you there anymore, there would be more determination to get you diagnosed so you could get the help you needed.  I guess because I was quiet and not disruptive, it was easier to ignore it?  Probably if it had been nowadays, I might have got diagnosed earlier because more teachers would probably know about AS and autism?

 

Yes, I do think there is more known about AS and autism nowadays and I guess pre-school teachers are more trained in it and can notice signs and possibly suggest to parents to look into getting it investigated. So, perhaps you would have got diagnosed earlier had it been these days. 

I guess if you were just quiet and reserved, there was no major urgent things to look at. Some kids are just shy... It's hard to know when to distinguish between just a personality trait and an actual possible trait of an ASD I guess. 

 

With me, there was just no hiding the fact I was different to all the other kids. I guess when it got to the point of still not saying any words at age 4, my mum was pretty worried. Anyway, I guess this thread isn't really about this! I suppose it's kind of about early experiences though, so I'm not totally off  :P

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Heather
Yes, I do think there is more known about AS and autism nowadays and I guess pre-school teachers are more trained in it and can notice signs and possibly suggest to parents to look into getting it investigated. So, perhaps you would have got diagnosed earlier had it been these days. 

I guess if you were just quiet and reserved, there was no major urgent things to look at. Some kids are just shy... It's hard to know when to distinguish between just a personality trait and an actual possible trait of an ASD I guess. 

 

With me, there was just no hiding the fact I was different to all the other kids. I guess when it got to the point of still not saying any words at age 4, my mum was pretty worried. Anyway, I guess this thread isn't really about this! I suppose it's kind of about early experiences though, so I'm not totally off  :P

Yeah I didn't have a speech delay that I know of and I think most of my behaviors could've been seen as normal but just more extreme in some cases.. especially shyness. And my parents were accepting of those little differences, and just sort of encouraged me to be more social?  Because I think that was always my most AS thing.. my shyness and social awkwardness.  And when I was younger I did really good in school I think and always focussed on school but got anxious when it came to recess and lunch more so because they were unorganized.  I think this sort of fits with first memory since it's all about early experiences sort of. :P I'll try not say much more and go way off though.  :P

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
spiderwoman0_2
That is lucky, that is good he was able to go to the mainstream school with the right support. I really wish I could have gone to a mainstream school, I just want to know what it is like, I know I would have been able to deal with it from an older age about 10 if I had one to one with me. I think the school and my mum just wanted to 'wrap me up in a bubble' away from any potential difficulty, but I disagree 

I agree with you, I didn't want Harry going to any special school, the junior school recommended to the secondary school for him to be in 'the nurture group' (lessons away from mainstream classes) but I got in touch with the secondary school and said that I wanted him to be with all the other kids in normal lessons because he's bright and would have been held back in the nurture group.  He's coped really well and the school said it was the right decision to make.  I'm a big believer in taking ASD kids out of their comfort zones so they can learn to cope with unpredictability and spontaneity.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Sofi
I agree with you, I didn't want Harry going to any special school, the junior school recommended to the secondary school for him to be in 'the nurture group' (lessons away from mainstream classes) but I got in touch with the secondary school and said that I wanted him to be with all the other kids in normal lessons because he's bright and would have been held back in the nurture group.  He's coped really well and the school said it was the right decision to make.  I'm a big believer in taking ASD kids out of their comfort zones so they can learn to cope with unpredictability and spontaneity.

 

I agree with you too, I wonder how different I would be now had I gone to a mainstream secondary school. I wish my mum had, had your thoughts on that too. Maybe she thought I totally was not capable of it. I used to go to the mainstream school with my key worker occasionally, for things like Home Economics class (cooking), woodwork class and an art club at their school, after school, and if their school was doing a school play, I went to help them paint the stage or something. Not very often and it didn't exactly do much for my integration. I also think it is good for the other kids to realise that some people have differences and it's okay and you can still be friends with them at school. 

 

Maybe the reason with me was because I was not at the right level in the academic classes, I would never have been able to keep up with the work content. I did different work and did lower level exam courses. But, the thing is, I'm not stupid, I'm really intelligent but just at what I know - not intelligent by IQ standards but I have a huge knowledge and interest about lots of subjects, just not stuff schools care about.... 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
iggy
I agree with you too, I wonder how different I would be now had I gone to a mainstream secondary school. I wish my mum had, had your thoughts on that too. Maybe she thought I totally was not capable of it. I used to go to the mainstream school with my key worker occasionally, for things like Home Economics class (cooking), woodwork class and an art club at their school, after school, and if their school was doing a school play, I went to help them paint the stage or something. Not very often and it didn't exactly do much for my integration. I also think it is good for the other kids to realise that some people have differences and it's okay and you can still be friends with them at school. 

 

Maybe the reason with me was because I was not at the right level in the academic classes, I would never have been able to keep up with the work content. I did different work and did lower level exam courses. But, the thing is, I'm not stupid, I'm really intelligent but just at what I know - not intelligent by IQ standards but I have a huge knowledge and interest about lots of subjects, just not stuff schools care about.... 

I know that you are unhappy about the way your school life went :( I, like so many others, do not own a time machine, or I would most definitely assist you. However, you are clearly a literate woman, with an in depth knowledge of several things eg your Greek obsession :) have you ever thought about writing a book about Greeks, it could be just a short one or something? That way, you can combine what you did get out of education with your personal interests.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
mary
I agree with you too, I wonder how different I would be now had I gone to a mainstream secondary school. I wish my mum had, had your thoughts on that too. Maybe she thought I totally was not capable of it. I used to go to the mainstream school with my key worker occasionally, for things like Home Economics class (cooking), woodwork class and an art club at their school, after school, and if their school was doing a school play, I went to help them paint the stage or something. Not very often and it didn't exactly do much for my integration. I also think it is good for the other kids to realise that some people have differences and it's okay and you can still be friends with them at school. 

 

Maybe the reason with me was because I was not at the right level in the academic classes, I would never have been able to keep up with the work content. I did different work and did lower level exam courses. But, the thing is, I'm not stupid, I'm really intelligent but just at what I know - not intelligent by IQ standards but I have a huge knowledge and interest about lots of subjects, just not stuff schools care about.... 

 

Sofi, this really touched me when I read this, as I had been saying something similar the other day, but in relation to the 'not knowing'.

 

I wondered what my life would have been like had I known I had a diagnosis of AS and whether school life would have been made any easier, or if I'd have been treated differently so as not to rebel so much against teachers who were trying to force my hand about classes they wanted me to take because I was 'too smart not to be doing this' and 'had such a great understanding of the subjects, it was wrong for me not to do them'.

 

I guess in some ways it's hard knowing a diagnosis at a younger age, but then it's harder for younger people because they are treated so very differently because they know of the diagnosis.

 

Do I regret anything I've done in my life?  Not really, but I guess one thing I'd change is the rebelling against school subjects, because I understand that I could have actually been anything had I put my mind to it and oh my god, how many times did I hear that throughout my life?  What am I now?  A secretary / medical secretary / co-ordinator in a hospital department.  Does it make me really happy?  Not really, I enjoy my job but it's no passion of mine if that makes sense.

 

I think in your situation it'd be wise to try and take comfort from the fact that people were trying to have your best interests at heart and thought they were doing the right thing.  You are so obviously an intelligent person and you have a great knowledge on many things, not only your interest areas.  You are such a caring, genuine person as well, and that doesn't come from any teachings... that's how you are wired.  Yes, you had your struggles when you were younger but you are seeing your way through and finding different ways to cope with things every day.  You should be VERY proud of yourself, and I'm not saying this to sound condescending at all.

 

I'm sure, when the time comes and you feel ready, you'll see what you are capable of doing and you might just surprise yourself.  I'm sure like has been mentioned you may be able to do something with your key knowledge areas in some way or another.

 

I actually think that had I known I had a diagnosis my life would have been very different, because I'd have no doubt been treated very differently... but do I think that'd have ultimately been a good thing?  I don't know... I guess I'd not have done half of what I have done because people would have wrapped me in cotton wool and pushed my academic side.

 

So many things to think about... all the time.  Why couldn't I be NT!?  (I don't really mean that, I don't think I'd actually change me all that much)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
mary

I think I side tracked myself there, sorry!!  I can't remember much very early on... I'm going to have to have a think about what I would consider my first memory... such a good thread and so interesting to see how far back people can remember :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
spiderwoman0_2
I agree with you too, I wonder how different I would be now had I gone to a mainstream secondary school. I wish my mum had, had your thoughts on that too. Maybe she thought I totally was not capable of it. I used to go to the mainstream school with my key worker occasionally, for things like Home Economics class (cooking), woodwork class and an art club at their school, after school, and if their school was doing a school play, I went to help them paint the stage or something. Not very often and it didn't exactly do much for my integration. I also think it is good for the other kids to realise that some people have differences and it's okay and you can still be friends with them at school. 

 

Maybe the reason with me was because I was not at the right level in the academic classes, I would never have been able to keep up with the work content. I did different work and did lower level exam courses. But, the thing is, I'm not stupid, I'm really intelligent but just at what I know - not intelligent by IQ standards but I have a huge knowledge and interest about lots of subjects, just not stuff schools care about.... 

You sound just like Harry, he's very bright but he struggles with English and writing (no one can read it lol) and he hates reading fiction.  To be honest I think half the things they learn at school are a waste of time and people should never be judged by how many exams they have.  Sometimes those with the most qualifications can be the most stupid lol.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
mary
Sometimes those with the most qualifications can be the most stupid lol.

 

Indeed!!  I have found this throughout my life... and will no doubt have it proved to me more and more as I go along in life.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Restore formatting

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.


×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

By using this site, you agree to our Terms of Use.