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Willow

Do You Ever Worry You Don't Have Aspergers?

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Willow

I guess this is more aimed at those who don't have a diagnosis. And really, my first question would be, how did you come to the conclusion that you have Aspergers? Then from that, are you getting a formal diagnosis? And if so, what will happen if they say you don't have Aspergers? 

But for those of you with a diagnosis, do you ever worry that it is a mis diagnosis? Either because you just feel it doesn't fit, or because you sometimes look at how other people are and worry that you're coping better so maybe you don't have it?

I sometimes think that I've 'grown out' of Aspergers, until I realise that I've just learnt to cope better as I've gotten older. Though, mostly that's due to isolating myself in my home with Chris, or just on my own when he's at work. And as for going out, I rarely get out of my car unless it's somewhere I know won't be busy, or I'm familiar with it.

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Annaflower
I guess this is more aimed at those who don't have a diagnosis. And really, my first question would be, how did you come to the conclusion that you have Aspergers? Then from that, are you getting a formal diagnosis? And if so, what will happen if they say you don't have Aspergers? 

But for those of you with a diagnosis, do you ever worry that it is a mis diagnosis? Either because you just feel it doesn't fit, or because you sometimes look at how other people are and worry that you're coping better so maybe you don't have it?

I sometimes think that I've 'grown out' of Aspergers, until I realise that I've just learnt to cope better as I've gotten older. Though, mostly that's due to isolating myself in my home with Chris, or just on my own when he's at work. And as for going out, I rarely get out of my car unless it's somewhere I know won't be busy, or I'm familiar with it.

I think you are right that you have learnt to manage your Aspergers and this has lead to your AS traits being less obvious. This does not mean that you no longer have it, just that you avoid the situations where it has been a problem in the past.

As with Autism in general, Aspergers is a sliding scale of intensity. I have a mental image of a grid of 500 squares, each one representing a trait of AS. For each person they will tick a differnet ammount and combination of those traits within their character. For a diagnosis of AS they would need to tick between a third and two thirds of those squares. Below a third would be NT and above two thirds would be classic autism. for every person who is in the AS 'zone' they will have their own combination of traits. Some of them will be outwardly obvious and some may be more hidden. This means that each AS person cannot be the same as another and so comparisons person to person are misleading.

I realise this is a very simplistic and non scientific representation, but it helps me to understand the intricacies of ASD.

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Willow
I think you are right that you have learnt to manage your Aspergers and this has lead to your AS traits being less obvious. This does not mean that you no longer have it, just that you avoid the situations where it has been a problem in the past. As with Autism in general, Aspergers is a sliding scale of intensity. I have a mental image of a grid of 500 squares, each one representing a trait of AS. For each person they will tick a differnet ammount and combination of those traits within their character. For a diagnosis of AS they would need to tick between a third and two thirds of those squares. Below a third would be NT and above two thirds would be classic autism. for every person who is in the AS 'zone' they will have their own combination of traits. Some of them will be outwardly obvious and some may be more hidden. This means that each AS person cannot be the same as another and so comparisons person to person are misleading. I realise this is a very simplistic and non scientific representation, but it helps me to understand the intricacies of ASD.

It's an interesting way of looking at the spectrum. I think in a similar kind of way, in that, everyone is on the spectrum - it's just where humans fall, but that the further up you go, the more symptoms you have etc, the more AS you are. Which is why some NT's will say they feel the same about being socially awkward or whatever, and it's because everyone can experience these traits but to less of a degree and maybe not mixed with all of the others.

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Annaflower
It's an interesting way of looking at the spectrum. I think in a similar kind of way, in that, everyone is on the spectrum - it's just where humans fall, but that the further up you go, the more symptoms you have etc, the more AS you are. Which is why some NT's will say they feel the same about being socially awkward or whatever, and it's because everyone can experience these traits but to less of a degree and maybe not mixed with all of the others.
Absolutely. There are so many variables. Each trait will have a scale of severity, then for each additional trait it will make more impact on how the person can cope with the others. Like spinning plates, the more you have the tougher it will be to keep everything going!

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Sofi

I don't think I ever worry this :( I usually look at other people on the spectrum and think they are much more higher functioning than me and then I feel really autistic. I wish I could be more like them, but it's okay. Everyone is different. 

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ztnt

I don't really care anymore if a have or not.

Never really felt that a diagnosis would define who I am.

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Annaflower
I don't think I ever worry this :( I usually look at other people on the spectrum and think they are much more higher functioning than me and then I feel really autistic. I wish I could be more like them, but it's okay. Everyone is different. 
For each of us, our 'traits', be they complex enough for a diagnosis or not, make us who we are and that is a good thing! Life would be so boring if we were all the same. I know that sometimes life gets tough and we may wish to change things about ourselves, but the trick is to learn to love and respect each and every thing about ourselves which will ultimately lead to happiness.

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Sofi
I don't really care anymore if a have or not.

Never really felt that a diagnosis would define who I am.

 

Autism does define me but not in a negative way, it is just because it is all that I am. I wouldn't be me if I didn't have autism. It does give me a meaning. I would be feeling awfully confused with myself why I was not like everyone else if I did not have this diagnosis. All I have ever known is having autism from having it known since I was 4.

 

 

 

For each of us, our 'traits', be they complex enough for a diagnosis or not, make us who we are and that is a good thing! Life would be so boring if we were all the same. I know that sometimes life gets tough and we may wish to change things about ourselves, but the trick is to learn to love and respect each and every thing about ourselves which will ultimately lead to happiness.

 

Yes, you are right. I just have to accept myself for who I am and not compare myself to others. Everyone has different struggles. It can only be inspiration to me if someone else copes better with something. Sometimes, I just feel really affected by autism

 

 

Although, do I ever worry that I don't have Aspergers? Yes, because I don't have it (that's a joke, not funny) 

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Toran

Its not something I try to concern myself with because I know I have AS by the symtoms and my lifes history if its not then everything they say about it is wrong because I have those symptoms since my first memorys. What does concern me about the test is the coping mechanisms that I have put in place and how I have come to learn meanings that a young person wouldnt know because they havent had life experiences and made many mistakes to know these things. In the assessment do I not use what I know to be how I am or do I use it then I could get the wrong evaluation because I dont appear as a young autistic person would. I constantly stop swaying when im anxious in public because I was laughed at but at home I do it without thinking because im comfortable there. If I end up doing the two then the assessor may think whatever. Thats my concern not the fact that I have it but how I have adapted to it in life could effect my assesment.

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mary
I guess this is more aimed at those who don't have a diagnosis. And really, my first question would be, how did you come to the conclusion that you have Aspergers? Then from that, are you getting a formal diagnosis? And if so, what will happen if they say you don't have Aspergers? 

But for those of you with a diagnosis, do you ever worry that it is a mis diagnosis? Either because you just feel it doesn't fit, or because you sometimes look at how other people are and worry that you're coping better so maybe you don't have it?

I sometimes think that I've 'grown out' of Aspergers, until I realise that I've just learnt to cope better as I've gotten older. Though, mostly that's due to isolating myself in my home with Chris, or just on my own when he's at work. And as for going out, I rarely get out of my car unless it's somewhere I know won't be busy, or I'm familiar with it.

 

I find this very interesting Willow.  Having only known I have AS since September last year I'm relatively new to the whole idea of it.  I had, however, spoken about AS in relation to others and said that I didn't see it as a disability.

 

I do sometimes look at what traits are meant to be, and I do wonder if I fulfill the full criteria, but then I realise that I must have done to have been given the diagnosis.  When I did the test, I actually looked at the answers properly and esp at the ones my mum answered about me from when I was younger, and I couldn't argue with the results.

 

I don't worry that I have a diagnosis of AS and I certainly didn't think it'd cause me any problems.  Unfortunately someone has made it cause problems for me and that is rather disappointing, however, I'm hoping that this will be resolved imminently.  Once that has been sorted I will go back to being rather ambivilent about it.  I just see it as giving reasons for why I felt I was so strange and different all my life.  I can relate to the things mentioned re traits and it all makes sense now.

 

I think you are right that you have learnt to manage your Aspergers and this has lead to your AS traits being less obvious. This does not mean that you no longer have it, just that you avoid the situations where it has been a problem in the past. As with Autism in general, Aspergers is a sliding scale of intensity. I have a mental image of a grid of 500 squares, each one representing a trait of AS. For each person they will tick a differnet ammount and combination of those traits within their character. For a diagnosis of AS they would need to tick between a third and two thirds of those squares. Below a third would be NT and above two thirds would be classic autism. for every person who is in the AS 'zone' they will have their own combination of traits. Some of them will be outwardly obvious and some may be more hidden. This means that each AS person cannot be the same as another and so comparisons person to person are misleading. I realise this is a very simplistic and non scientific representation, but it helps me to understand the intricacies of ASD.

 

That's an interesting way to look at it and it certainly would make it make more sense for people from the outside looking in.  I agree, people learn coping mechanisms of all kinds as they go on in life, some are better than others at doing so, but it's all about learning.  If we continually learn from our experiences we are doing well, no matter how little or how much we learn throughout the process.

 

I don't really care anymore if a have or not.

Never really felt that a diagnosis would define who I am.

 

I just wonder, do you have a diagnosis or did you self diagnose?  Not that it really makes any difference I know, but it'd just be interesting to know.

 

Autism does define me but not in a negative way, it is just because it is all that I am. I wouldn't be me if I didn't have autism. It does give me a meaning. I would be feeling awfully confused with myself why I was not like everyone else if I did not have this diagnosis. All I have ever known is having autism from having it known since I was 4.

 

Yes, you are right. I just have to accept myself for who I am and not compare myself to others. Everyone has different struggles. It can only be inspiration to me if someone else copes better with something. Sometimes, I just feel really affected by autism

 

Although, do I ever worry that I don't have Aspergers? Yes, because I don't have it (that's a joke, not funny) 

 

I think, Sofi, that you're in a different position because you've known of your diagnosis for a long time, ie since you were 4, so you've pretty much grown up with it and known about it in your most formative years.  I agree that you wouldn't be you without your autism and it makes you who you are.  I'd agree that for everyone really... whilst sometimes we'd really prefer not to have a specific trait or whatever, we'd not be who we were without our autism, and I don't know that I'd want to actually be different, for the good points or the bad.

 

I think that self acceptance is the most important part with all of this... if we can be happy within ourselves, things can only begin to get better for us, even if slowly, very slowly, at times.

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