Jump to content
Kuribo

"Taking everything literally"

Recommended Posts

Dr-David-Banner

Seemingly, yes. Just to add recent personal experience. Over the weeks I got to meet some people with a lot of down-to -earth chat. At the start one woman especially was kind of shy and seened to feel I was very serious. She just stayed aloof when I talked. Fairly recently a big change came about. They were all calling me by my first name. Taking time to include me. All now very normal. One other woman is very defensive of me generally. I actually wonder if one of them has worked out my real issue as she has an autistic son - the rest normal. Pretty much most people say the same thing, however. For many weeks they find me unsettling and very strange but in time get to know me and relax. I also have a sense of humour in everyday life but a bit immature. So at present I can eventually come across as nice to know although mostly it's female groups who include me. Despite that the problem is still very serious. Stuff like motor awkwardness and odd interaction make any normal job unreachable. Plus I need my "out time" to my own space. On bad days I may get "reactive autism" symptoms. This is to do with reacting to situations on the basis of past bad experiences and even a touch of paranoia. This is the accumalative effect of social isolation - "they just pretend to be nice".

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Aspergolfer

I'm a very concrete thinker, but I understand idiom and sarcasm. When I use my trademark "vibrating hairs" sayings, it doesn't mean that hairs are actually vibrating. It's a statement of pleasure (hairs vibrating at the right frequency), or displeasure (hairs vibrating at the wrong frequency). We Autistics are known for interesting figures of speech & ill admit that say that something makes my hairs vibrate is pretty unusual.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Sanctuary
On 11/7/2019 at 2:36 PM, Dr-David-Banner said:

For many weeks they find me unsettling and very strange but in time get to know me and relax.

This has certainly happened to me and may be quite common among those with ASD. They may find it much harder than neurotypicals to make a good "first impression" but slowly over time others get to know them and become more inclusive. By contrast some neurotypicals make very good first impressions but after a short time others find them shallow, annoying or "false". Relationships with autistic individuals tend to be "slow burners" while those with neurotypicals can flare into life, sometimes burning out quickly or settling down or continuing to burn strongly. First impressions though are important and in some cases those with autism find that others never really warm to them or even continue to treat them badly. Overall I would say that our relationships with others tend not to develop the closeness often found with neurotypicals; close relationships including deep friendships can occur but much less frequently.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Dr-David-Banner

It's first name terms all the time at the moment. I use their names too. It could be though they worked it out. Autism can sometimes be easy to spot. People noticed my looking away during conversation and they will notice interaction that doesn't seem typical. Someone with autistic children will be more aware. Which brings me to the big issue - therapy. Lately I'm wary of trapping myself into a label. No, autism can't be undone but it can be managed. Best start is to get rid of bitterness and anger which is the result of former discrimination or even abuse. Then I study on film for example how people smile and react. That made me realise why I am hard to socialise with. Autism very much affects the emotional communicative aspect. Not surprising as it's centred around nerve impulses and signals in the communicative sense and not pure intellectual problem solving.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Restore formatting

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.


×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

By using this site, you agree to our Terms of Use.