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Dr-David-Banner

Antisocial Personality

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Dr-David-Banner

This symptom I'm aware of. The great scientist and inventor Tesla actually stated once being antisocial is a positive trait. I have mixed feelings about it. I mean, I'm not too proud of being intolerant which I admit I tend to be. However, I will try and explain what it is that brings about my anti social attitude. That is, my reluctance to take socialising seriously. Well, basically people around are so identical in the way they think that it's like boring repetition. I find it impossible to find an individual who thinks differently or creatively. Any conversation undertaken is going to lead to some down-to-earth topic along the same trodden path. I mean, it's no good asking, "What is your opinion of...." because 98 per cent of those around don't have a real opinion. I think this is what John Lennon was getting at in his "Nowhere Man" song. "Doesn't have a point of view, knows not where he's going to, Nowhere Man do you see me at all?". To be honest, I gave up even attempting genuine communication months ago. I do still talk routinely but to others I'm just someone kind of strange. You appear strange if you show signs of not having been programmed by a shared set of currently accepted values. As to morals for me I don't need to be taught this by society. I respect life and nature through inner awareness. So being anti social hasn't criminalised me. This now leads to relationships. I get a lot of curiosity over this. The answer is simple. Being so totally disconnected from society as I see it, I'm not at all employable. I just don't fit. To fit I would have to be as normal as everyone else. I couldn't even handle a shop job. Now pretty much most women are programmed to ultimately want a home and family. Any close female friends I have couldn't find that stability with me. It would be unfair. So, is there any positive side to such a sad affair? Well, yes. I bear in mind there are people worse off. Lots of people suffer tribulations or misfortune. I just accept myself with my pluses and minuses. The time I am unable to use socialising as normal I will try and use creatively. Not just exist to follow a set washing machine program. Also I learned it's super important to believe in yourself. As Tesla stated isolation triggers creativity. One final point. Years ago when I tried teaching English in Spain I noticed that children in the classes were really creative in their own way. They often showed real ovservation and ability to see things individually. I recall showing a film in English and the kids were commenting on how they interpreted scenes. They seemed at that age to have imagination. Yet, over time, with socialising and conforming that spark dies. What remains is a processed personality manufactured by a drive to be liked and be popular. Opinions are those of the accepted mass view. Those who appear to think their own way are classed as strange. In the seventeenth century they were accused of being witches. Societies have always been primative and prone to mass influence.

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Peridot

My isolation enables creativity. I'm alone pretty much always. The only way to be more alone is if I were to go and live in the woods without an internet connection. lol That's the only way I can be more alone. But I'm not that bothered by it... There are many awesome people out there and maybe I'll reach out to some of them in a later chapter of my life but right now things just are the way they're supposed to be. As long as you're on the right track in life it's OK to be alone.

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Ace

 

12 hours ago, Dr-David-Banner said:

This symptom I'm aware of. The great scientist and inventor Tesla actually stated once being antisocial is a positive trait. I have mixed feelings about it. I mean, I'm not too proud of being intolerant which I admit I tend to be. However, I will try and explain what it is that brings about my anti social attitude. That is, my reluctance to take socialising seriously. Well, basically people around are so identical in the way they think that it's like boring repetition. I find it impossible to find an individual who thinks differently or creatively. Any conversation undertaken is going to lead to some down-to-earth topic along the same trodden path. I mean, it's no good asking, "What is your opinion of...." because 98 per cent of those around don't have a real opinion. I think this is what John Lennon was getting at in his "Nowhere Man" song. "Doesn't have a point of view, knows not where he's going to, Nowhere Man do you see me at all?". To be honest, I gave up even attempting genuine communication months ago. I do still talk routinely but to others I'm just someone kind of strange. You appear strange if you show signs of not having been programmed by a shared set of currently accepted values. As to morals for me I don't need to be taught this by society. I respect life and nature through inner awareness. So being anti social hasn't criminalised me. This now leads to relationships. I get a lot of curiosity over this. The answer is simple. Being so totally disconnected from society as I see it, I'm not at all employable. I just don't fit. To fit I would have to be as normal as everyone else. I couldn't even handle a shop job. Now pretty much most women are programmed to ultimately want a home and family. Any close female friends I have couldn't find that stability with me. It would be unfair. So, is there any positive side to such a sad affair? Well, yes. I bear in mind there are people worse off. Lots of people suffer tribulations or misfortune. I just accept myself with my pluses and minuses. The time I am unable to use socialising as normal I will try and use creatively. Not just exist to follow a set washing machine program. Also I learned it's super important to believe in yourself. As Tesla stated isolation triggers creativity. One final point. Years ago when I tried teaching English in Spain I noticed that children in the classes were really creative in their own way. They often showed real ovservation and ability to see things individually. I recall showing a film in English and the kids were commenting on how they interpreted scenes. They seemed at that age to have imagination. Yet, over time, with socialising and conforming that spark dies. What remains is a processed personality manufactured by a drive to be liked and be popular. Opinions are those of the accepted mass view. Those who appear to think their own way are classed as strange. In the seventeenth century they were accused of being witches. Societies have always been primative and prone to mass influence.

I couldn't have put it better myself. For me, I don't mind the social interaction that I have to be involved in with school (like group projects) but that's because it is at least usually focused on academic subjects. As soon as someone starts going on a tangent about their new favorite barber they found or something like that, I just feel so out of place, at least I used to. Now I just pretend to run with it while at the same time diverting it back to the academics. That way the group project or whatever doesn't get awkward but also stays productive. I just see their chit chat as some kind of automatic response that they so easily can fall into. I sometimes even wonder if there are some people whose whole life is just autopilot. The people who don't go to school anymore, the ones in mindless job from 9 to 5, the ones whose daily routine is almost identical every day of the week then party or hang out with friends all weekend getting their selfies in so that they can post them throughout the next week, those kinds of people. They do almost no critical thinking and live entirely off their automatic social responses. In my perspective being capable of some socializing but not wanting to seek it out is the best. In my over 4 years in college I have only been to 4 parties, 2 of which my roommates threw at our place. I find in my free time I will sometimes open my CAD software and start designing something, or start writing some code for some mundane task. I have this dream build overlanding vehicle idea that I have all the details on a google doc that I sometimes work on, ironing out more details and doing more research into parts, automotive systems, and overlanding gear. and go figure it is 21 pages long, probably the longest document of any kind I have ever written. I too seem to be more creative when I let my mind wonder. It took my mom a while to figure out that I am totally content being alone but my dad has yet to figure that out I think. 

About the shop job, I actually do have a job working in a restoration shop that I can pick up anytime when I go home. But that is probably because I know a pretty good amount about automotive stuff and I am pretty good with my hands. I love hands on kind of stuff. 

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Dr-David-Banner

I am not really accepted in any working environment. Many people just get uneasy. Even friends can get frustrated working with me as so much I do a different way. My life really is very similar to Carnival Of Souls. The difficulty is that being so cut off we aren't geared to get by on our own. Pretty much all people need support or encouragement. Normally when you get really cut off you would then suffer major psychological breakdown but, over time, I learned to adapt. I had to try and develop strong self belief. The irony is no matter how bad my problems may be, other people seem to be paying a big price too. Just one example. Have you noticed how natural it is for people to protest over education and tuition fees. It doesn't occur to them you can learn probably more without being in some institution or faculty. People depend so much upon systems but systems break down. I was in the USSR when the whole economic and social system collapsed. Thousands were left with nothing. We are conditioned to accept the majority must be right.

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Dr-David-Banner

Here is what can happen: If there's pronounced impairment in social communication, it means the individual concerned may spend more time in isolation. In a few cases, this may result in hours and hours of time devoted to a particular interest or group of interests. Despite the fact that some of us actually lagged behind at school and were slower to respond to teaching, in later life we may alter significantly due to the vast time devoted to our interest. So, for example, with regard to myself I was always pretty hopeless at maths but these days I may spend hours and hours working at it. Realistically, seeing as social communication and social activity is off the agenda, there is a gap to fill in somehow. However, I now find all of this complicates A.S. even more. It makes an even bigger gap. People start to stand out somehow for their emotional dependency. The whole functional cycle revolves around emotions. With one type of autism specifically, emotions as it stands are pretty weak compared with normality. This has been observed in autistic children from a very early age. Yet, to add to the equation, hours and hours spent calculating or analysing seems to have an added effect. Likewise if you don't socialise hardly at all that can have consequences. It would be convenient to find a sensible solution but it's tricky. Not being good at socialising in the first place has its roots established from childhood. Likewise being good at socialising depends upon being pretty much the same as everyone else, speaking the same, thinking the same and so on.

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